wilderness path

a significant inner journey




Monday, October 31, 2011

Desert Spirit




     Today my Lesson reads,


Salvation of the world depends on me.”


Today we will not shrink from our assignment on the

specious grounds that modesty is outraged.”



     The Thought enters me swiftly…..today... You my Creator are the Ocean; I am the seagull. And as the tide recedes so do I rest.  And as the tide changes, and comes in, it will BRING TO ME my daily bread, my meal, in endless supply, effortlessly.





     You can and will feed me. I will not eat from the land fill that is full of garbage and mankind’s waste. My natural place as the seagull is at the ocean, on the ocean shore, waiting for the tide to change that comes in and brings to me the meal You will send to me that will feed me.





     The tides are changing, as the world of time designates today as the ending of a monthly cycle, and as this page is turned, will reveal the beginning of a new cycle, that which we call November.


     The tide has changed and the supply seems to have been temporarily withdrawn. But I will wait here until the tide changes again and brings back to me Your Gifts.


     You Who are the Abundant Ocean return to me the bounty of my daily bread to which I AM entitled and ONLY THIS will sustain me. I accept no less than this.


shrink - to contract, as from heat, cold, moisture, etc; to lessen as in amount; flinch; to draw back


     You ask me to not shrink from my assignment today. Then, the test would come to attempt to diminish my desires to rise above the noise and clutter of a useless world. My mind suggests that payment must be made for debt I owe to the Sonship. Yet my study I extend TO the Sonship daily is more than anything the world can expect to receive from me. And so let this expression I share be the payment I send to all minds, that it may satisfy the inner longing of all minds.


     I will not lessen my lesson or my expectations to BE the Merchant that You have given to, asking me to extend this cleaning to all minds. And the needy WILL receive, even when they do not think they ARE receiving. And so this truth must be true for me also; that I Receive Your grace even when my arrogant mind attempts to convince me otherwise.


I will not flinch. I will not doubt. But the challenges of the day only serve to strengthen my determination to fulfill my Part that You HAVE assigned to me.


assignment; assign -  (a sign?) (L, ad, to + signare, to sign) - to sign to (a contract?) to set apart or mark for a specific purpose; designate; to appoint; to point to; to point to a duty; to give out as a task; to allot; to attribute; to ascribe (a scribe)


     So you give me a Contract to fulfill, and I agreed TO fulfill it. And in the tests You provide I will not contract FROM the Terms OF the Contract.


     As the message of the Bee has already revealed, I am set apart for a specific purpose, one the world does not see. I am fed a Special Diet, raised in a Special Chamber, and it is not arrogance that would make this claim. If this IS the Truth You share with me today, then it is only IN humility that I accept this Role. It is only in true modesty that I refrain from doubting the Mighty Modest Task assigned to me.


     Therefore, let me carry out this assignment today, in spite of what my mind attempts to tell me. There IS Order, and I am in It. There is Balance and there is Harmony that You have revealed in my world.


     And in this truth I will accept no less than this.


     Be it so now.

     “It is done.”




Halloween - Something is not right......with me...... from desert spirit on Vimeo.


Tonight I was sitting on my front porch, in the dark, and it was very enchanting. I went to purchase candy for the children for Halloween that I thought might come to my house for Halloween. I purchased the mask in the video, and thought I would scare them a little. 

So as it got dark, I dressed up, and shut off all the lights, and went to the porch with only a candle lighting me and the porch. I had a bowl of candy for them when they came. And I had that spooky music in the video playing on my laptop so it would play and then repeat again and again, and I sat on the porch in the dark with my candle and waited….and waited….and waited… but no one came.


I sat for a half hour and not a single child came by. So as I sat there in my mask, and with the candle lit, in the cool of the dark night, I started thinking of Halloween, when I was a child, and how it has changed so much. It is no longer magical, but has been associated with criminal activity, child abduction, child molestation, children being poisoned with rotten candy and so forth. It is not like it was when I was a small boy, and this I started thinking about this Halloween night.


I started thinking how the fun had been gone from this holiday, and how it was no longer magical. The festivities of Halloween go back a very long time, and so it was associated with spirits and things unseen, of witches flying on broom sticks, or ghost and goblins and all sorts of strange things. All this was gone.


And as no children came to trick or treat, I also thought about how in the bigger picture of life, how we as spirits have lost the magic in us, where once faeries and gnomes, and trolls and sprites, and gremlins, and brownies and nature spirits and all these fantasy things, of unicorns and mermaids and all this magic were once part of the beautiful spirit imagination in us, and that it was gone… we have become dull and dead inside, serving a meaningless world.


And I was thinking of all of this and it started to make me feel sad that all this magic we had lost. And then something started to happen…..like I said in the video, but there on the porch something really did start happening. I started to hear children.


The light on my front lawn lamp was lit but it started flickering, on and off and on and off and it would go out and come on again. And this bulb has been burning all night every night without any trouble, but this particular night it was flickering and blinking on and off and doing weird things. And the music just kept playing from my laptop that strange music.


I was like in a trance, or something changed, the atmosphere, like I entered another dimension maybe, and I started hearing children speaking and laughing. First it was just a little, very soft, but then as I tried to hear more it grew. I sat up and looked up and down the street, but the street was empty…. not a soul was walking on the street. But I could hear children… and they were laughing…. and whispering to each other.


And as I sat there I started thinking that I was imagining this, and then it grew. And it was like they were in my front yard. Then on the porch. And I turned to look at the candle on the small table, and as I went to grab it, before my hand even touched it, the candle knocked over. And I was startled. And I could hear laughing.


And then I sat and started thinking this was maybe the spirit of children coming to show me a true Halloween…..trick or treat….but I was not giving out treats to children… but children were playing tricks on me, perhaps… the spirit of many children, and as I sat there with my bowl of candy and dressed up like a monster, they were laughing at me. They were enjoying my participation.


And it was all very strange, all of this. Then it grew very silent again.


And then I heard voices…coming down the street. And I thought, “Oh, good, finally some people coming for candy…”


And then all of a sudden three or four young boys and girls were walking, like single file, and they each had a very small light, like a very small flash light, swinging from their hand, not pointing it anywhere but just in their hand and their hand was swinging as they walked and so the light would swing also… and they were walking in the street and walked right by the house slowly, wordlessly, soundlessly...I could not even hear their footsteps on the pavement. So I picked up the candle and sort of waved it to show them I was on the front porch so they might come for the candy, but they never even looked at me. They just kept walking in single file looking down at their feet as they walked in single file.


And then behind them there was a small cart or a bike of some kind, and it had a small headlight on it. And it was following them but no sound came from it or its occupants. And there were people on this cart or bike. And rode right by me, and I waved the candle, but they never looked up. Two more were behind the cart. They just proceeded down the street, without talking, like a procession of ghosts. And either I was invisible to their world, or they were invisible to mine but were allowing me to see them. Because they never made a noise, and just walked by, in silence.


When they were out of sight, I started thinking “This was a true Halloween night…. and it was for me… not so I could give children candy… the spirits came to show me another world, the world of the spirit.”


And so as I thought about all this I got a chill, and pulled off the mask, and went inside. Not a single child came to trick or treat.  But it seemed to me my mind had played ticks on me this Halloween night.