wilderness path

a significant inner journey

      I sent the following letter to Anne Marie that was returned to me with the word REFUSED written upon the envelope in her handwriting. It does not surprise me, but it is interesting that Anne Marie boasts about all the relationships from her past that she preserves. For some reason, she feels ours is not preservable. I post it here for her, as I understand she visits this site periodically.

  

 Saturday, July 21, 2018

Anne Marie Cotter

Bradenton, FL  34210

 

Hello Anne Marie,

      I trust all is good in your world. I will be brief. 

      If it is true “All relationships must end in Love,” then I would think that the opportunity to be civilized to one another would fall under that principle. If you wish to be bitter about our past, so be it. Yet I will to not assume. So if you are NOT bitter about our past and simply want nothing to do with me, that is all good. You have your reasons for feeling the way you do. I have no animosity about what transpired in our past. I do not deny my desire to return to Manila Lane one day, and that possibility I maintain. Yet it is not what dominates my world or thinking these days as there are other pressing issues to which I am exposed. 

     You are as certain as I that nothing happens by accident, which includes this message. My experiences are therefore part of whatever lesson Spirit would have me learn, as are yours. I do understand that resentments do not make good life companions and would not wish them upon anyone. I understand how this can handicap us. I have seen this most recently in my younger brother Peter’s life experience. It was recently revealed to me that he had to have his left foot and leg amputated below the knee. I would not wish such a lesson upon anyone. Peter is a strong advocate for the Christian teachings he follows, and in speaking to him I hear a profound faith that whatever the lesson is for him, it has not reduced him to a victim of an unscrupulous world.

         Briefly, I ended my relationship in 2016 with Anya’s previous employer, and no longer distribute that product line. I did initiate a relationship with another vendor, however, it is like starting all over again. My income took a terrible hit, while my expenses remained the same. Consequently I have neglected creditors. Yet it is manageable.    

     My main concern is about the cabin. It is in jeopardy due to missed payments. I have been able to ward off a potential foreclosure for the time being. As you know it has always been a sacred place for me, perhaps for you also. So I am reaching out to you for assistance. It seems a logical thing to do. There is no pride to interfere with my request. Other doors have been closed to me. Perhaps Spirit knows what is best in closing doors, and if I am to surrender the cabin to a Bank after 10 years of payments to them then I have to accept this. 

 

      You may recall your sister suggesting to you, when in Gallup I offered to purchase Manila Lane and you were not sure how to proceed, “Anne Marie, David needs his own home also, and the cabin is not a home”. So at the prompting of your sister, you agreed to “sell” Manila Lane to me. As our respective paths led us in different directions, with no fault or blame to anyone, you decided to move on after doing with Manila Lane what you felt was just and fair, to you, and I still have the cabin.

       Now today I would ask that you put your resentments aside, assuming you still carry them towards me, and help me retain the Arizona property. I previously asked you to offer me the same consideration of 10k that you offered Joe in your passing from him. It would help me to retain the property and provide some resources to me to travel out there to do some maintenance. If you feel my losing the cabin is what I deserve, then you are certainly free to retain such justifications you may have for thinking that way. Certainly what we desire for others is what we desire ourselves, and I have only wanted that you be free to love yourself.

     So I have offered to amend our past. Perhaps you feel you have amended yours. Then I would welcome a meeting with you and your new companion, and Anya and I would come down to share a meal.  

 

     You maintained a relationship with me until you discovered my love for Anya. Why that would be so distasteful to you I do not understand. But you have your reasons. I do not wish to open up any old wounds, and in fact encourage them to be healed. We can still be cordial and or civilized to one another. If no contact with me or us is your criteria for maintaining your inner peace, so be it. But I am reminded that you are the one who advocated for having relationships with your passing relationship. I do not see why ours would be excluded.

       I still have the same phone number; not sure if you do. I have not attempted to text or call that number. If you wish to respond, my details are below. 

     Thanks for listening, and I apologize to you for any harm you feel I may have imposed upon you or your family, friends and associates.   

     Your brother in spirit,

    

     David Salas